The Clients I Attract (and Repel)

I told a person the other day that we build visionary web sites for people interested in providing access to health and spirit. Which is what The Foco does.

And then the person asked me, So you are telling me that if somebody who wasn’t interested in health and spirit asked you to build their web site you would turn them down?

I laughed in their face! Not in a bad way, I just found their comment really funny. The truth is that I never really thought of it. Nobody who I don’t like has ever asked me to build a web site. So I have never had to turn a client away.

That is the beauty about knowing what you want. TheFoco.com screams health and spirit. It screams it so loud that anyone not interested in health and spirit will be literally scared away.

What this person taught me was the beautiful law of attraction AND the law of repulsion. We are always attracting things. BUT we are always repelling things too.

That is why I have never had to tell somebody that the site they want to build is not part of my mission. They get the message without me having to open my mouth. We both travel on different paths.

If I was not clear about my mission then there would be trouble. They wouldn’t get my message and so would ask me to build a site for them. I would then have to either compromise my life direction and accept their money, or I would have to turn it down.

But since the message of TheFoco.com is clear we avoid that. People have chosen us to build their site after reading my rice porridge recipe!

This is something I struggled with at first. I went years without a blog because I wasn’t comfortable with myself (hey, I still struggle sometimes!). I would want to blog about things like rice porridge and my mind would tell me that is not a respectable thing for a web producer. So I just didn’t blog.

And then I was like, Screw this!… I will blog about what my heart strings sing. This will attract people and repel people. But my heart will be clean. And thus started one of the most fulfilling activities I do.

I now see that to build truly visionary web sites you have to pull from all aspects of life. It can’t be a closed void of fancy technology. A visionary web site has a place in it somewhere somehow for rice porridge.

This isn’t complicated stuff: be yourself and the right people will like you. But I know as well as anyone that it isn’t easy sometimes. I’m sure people can agree to that! But it is the best thing anyone can do for themselves. And that too I think is a universal truth.

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Karma, Scottish style

I got this chain letter today. I liked it because it was a nice example of Karma, Scottish style.

The story goes like this: 

His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog.

He dropped his tools and ran to the bog.

There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.

The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved.

"I want to repay you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life."

"No, I can't accept payment for what I did," the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel.

"Is that your son?" the nobleman asked.

"Yes," the farmer replied proudly.

"I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my own son will enjoy. If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of." And that he did.

Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time, graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin.

Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia.

What saved his life this time? Penicillin.

The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph Churchill. His son's name?

Sir Winston Churchill.

==

What goes around comes around. That is the law of karma. What I took from this story was not so much that if you do good you will get good in return, which I think is a pretty smart way of living, but rather that things work in mysterious ways. We have no idea how things will unfold. For me that allows me to let go and just trust that what I am doing now is ok.

This was also in the chain mail:

Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
Sing like nobody's listening.
Live like it's Heaven on Earth.

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Family in a Bubble

From the gazillion bubble show:

Every Bubble is Unique,

Every Person is Unique,

Enjoy your one of a Kind,

by Fan Yang, Bubble Artist.

Gennaro, Loretta, Saomi.

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Peak Potentials and happiness

I am taking a lot of courses with Peak Potentials, aka T Harv Ecker, aka the Millionaire Mind people. I got exposed to it when my ex-girlfriend (who is still a best friend) suggested I attend a course.

My first few minutes in the introductory evening were like, “Oh my god, this is the cheesiest sales pitch I have ever seen.” At the same time I was like, “Oh my god, people are buying in droves. How do they do that!?”

People were literally running to sign up for courses. Anyway, I like to expose myself to things that my mind absolutely distains. And my mind can’t stand watered down cheese ball spirituality for the masses.

My mind is quite a snob. I am well educated and NY has made me very suspicious of anything that is happy or doesn’t dress in fancy black clothes.

So I signed up. And sure enough my mind, uh, changed its mind. And in the process my body has benefited tremendously from the Peak Potentials courses. The activities are a little cheesy (like I’ve said), including lots of high fives and chanting things like, “I have a millionaire mind,” or “I am the master of my destiny.”

But hey, we all make up our own story in life. And what I once considered cheesy I now consider beautifully simple and clean. Life is very simple if you let it be. And hey, what is wrong with having a millionaire mind or being the master of my destiny. It might sound like a character out of a comic book, but who cares.

If it works don’t knock it. And this stuff has opened up my heart tremendously. I have learned to dream again. I have learned to enjoy the GAME of life. A game where play is the activity and seriousness is a drag.

We are all probably going to die. That has pretty much been established. And it really is the only thing that is certain. Ok, I got it. I’m going to die.

Now that I have established that there are about 70 years left in my life where I can do whatever the hell I want. The only rule is that I have to die at the end of it. So I realize now that I might as well enjoy the fucking process.

And when I am on my death bed do you really think I will give a shit about what I did? No!! The only thing I will care about is my current state of happiness and comfort.

Ask any person lying in their deathbed what they regret and they will more often than not change the subject and ask you for a new bed pan so they can take a piss and be more comfortable. They are focused on their current happiness. To a person looking death in the face anything but happiness in the now is useless theory.

That is the way we are. We often don’t realize it until it is too late though. We spend our life trying to get things done for some future or past goal. When in fact the only thing that is really important is our current happiness.

So I invite you to check in with yourself and eliminate anything that takes away from simple, wholesome happiness. I invite you to do more of the things that increase your happiness.

Warning Note: Don’t let your current distortions influence you into false happiness. If you are a heroin addict it might be easy to think happiness is another shot of heroin. Uh, no. That is not happiness. That is your current distortion.

So happiness is not easy to find, but it is worth getting. So start slow, realize it is a lifelong process. Realize it is the only important thing. Realize that it is what allows you to become a loving, compassionate, giving person to others. And realize that in the end is where true happiness lies.

So be kind to yourself, start where you can start. And again, the trick is to enjoy as much as you can the process. What I mean by this is to focus on the joy more than the pain, since life usually dishes out fair quantities of both.

Does this make sense? Makes sense to me.

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I am the webmaster

I am here to be alive and happy

My aura lends calm to my fellow humans

I am here to offer web sites of magic and beauty

So others can find their heartsong

I am here to see the great spirit

So I can share it with the world

We are all connected

We are all online

I am the webmaster Beating the drums

In our marching band tune to happiness, peace and enlightenment

Searching for the answers to our own unique puzzle

We are all connected

We are all online

I am the keeper of keys

In a house full of doors

More than one room may suit you

Diferent than the rest

For we all have a heart yet we have our own beat

And there is a web site out there

That keeps our own tune

I am the tour guide

On the surf trip to god

I am the map maker

On the road to health

Together we make the web

We are all connected

We are all online

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what if there was no god

imagine for a second a world without god. things just happen randomnly. there is no higher power deciding things. cars crash, people die, people live, they laugh, they steal. it all happens for no reason except for biological ones. So next time your partner cheats on you or you loose your job or anything else good or bad, it is just an occurance devoid of any devine intervention.

image we are totally alone on this planet in a huge void of black and cold space. there is no benevolent god looking down on us with loving eyes, planning our events with some higher plan.

if something happens it has no good or bad, no karma, no divine message. if that was the case then you would be free to put your own judgement on events in your life. the only message is the message you decide to put on it.

if you get fired from your job for example you can make your own story - you are a loser or you are being given freedom. If you are yelled at by somebody you can make your own story - they are idiots or they are helping you be a better person. It doesn't have to make sense, it doesn't have to work for others, it doesn't even have to be sane.

Next time something happens to you, make up your own story. Pick a story, any story. Pick a story that turns you on. Pick a story that makes you happy. Pick a story that makes your life more fulfilling. You'll be dead soon enough. Nobody really cares what story you pick, so pick one that suits your soul.

We give meaning to our own lives. We make our own mythology. There may be a god, but we decide how that god treats us.

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Law of Expansion

Whenever you come to a situation where you think to yourself, “There is absolutely no way I can do this,” if you jump in there is a little known law of the universe called expansion that can help you out. You can see this law well in any messy room. The mess expands exactly to fit the dimensions of the room.

When you enter a situation the law of expansion works in the same way. The energy of the situation will expand to fit the exact needs of the situation. You emenate the energy. That is the key.

Like Ford said, “If you think you can’t or if you think you can, you are probably right.”

Now I don’t mean situations where your inner mind is the only participant. I mean world situations involving outer circumstances (often including children, cars, noise, phone calls, deadlines, money, food etc… ie your waking hour activities).

The energy you bring to the table will expand to fit the room. Is your energy flustered and defeatest? Is it focused and centered? In many ways you only have to bring to the table a small kernel of what is needed. The universe will expand that energy. Doors will open, people will appear, freak coincidences will happen.

What is that kernel? The doors that open have no judgement! It could be a door to hell or a door to heaven. The key to that door lies in the kernel you braught to the table, and the kernel you continually bring to the table every moment of your breathing life.

What’s your kernel of energy? It doesn’t take huge amounts. Quality is more important than quantity here. You are just the rudder holder. You don’t need to be the ocean. Once you realize this you can take on ANYTHING with success.

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buddha

Here is a painting from a possible client of mine. I think Buddha is probably the most created religious icon. So many artists use it as inspiration. What could be better. The image literally fills you with peace.

The funny thing is that some Buddhists don’t believe in having his image. They claim he did not want his image worshipped. And much to their dismay the image of Buddha has become a very popular interior design fixture.

Think about it. A 2000 year old Buddhist statue (from monasteries that did believe in having his image) sitting in a NY banker’s penthouse or a swank nightclub. After two millenia of watching monks pray the poor statue has to watch cocktail parties and yuppies snorting coke (ok, ok, I am totally being mean to yuppie. Just having some fun).

But I don’t mind. For me that is what Buddha embodies - the universe in all its forms. yuppies or monks, they are all the same to buddha. They are part of him and he loves himself dearly. Which means not only are the yuppies and monks loved but since they are Buddha, they love each other and themselves too. It’s one big love fest!

buddha: desiree rowland

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Reef mataphor for web sites 2.0

I like to scuba dive. So I like reefs. A reef starts as a chunk of rock or a chunk of iron like a sunken ship. First little plankton forms on the object, then coral and little fish, then larger fish come to eat the little fish and before you know it you have a reef teeming with millions of life forms in an elaborate ecosystem.  A web 2.0 site is no diferent. The actual site itself is not so fancy. Unlike older web 1.0 sites a web 2.0 site starts off very basic. It has some simple environmental requirements, a couple useful tools, but it is not so interesting. But then some people come and add some content, then a couple others come and respond to that content with some more content and before you know it you have a teeming ecosystem with millions of postings, members, files and all sorts of other stimulating things. A 2.0 web site is nothing more than an artificial reef. A marine ecologist and a web producer are very similar. We are both trying to recreate the beauty of nature. A web producer at their best striving to create a teeming environment of beauty and inspiration. Before you say I'm waxiing too romantic about my field how many hours does the average person spend in front of the computer? (average rich westerner that is, since the average global citizen is lucky if they have EVER used one. it is easy to forget that). We spend huge amounts of time in front of the computer. More and more. And the relationship and interaction we have on the computer is increasingly a more meaningful experience. As the tools get better web producers come closer and closer to being virtual movie directors of real life. One day I predict some people will have more meaningful relationships with their online friends than people in their immediate physical environment.I am an extreme example but I am there already, at least in terms of the time i spend with people online, which is more time than i spend with people in real life. I run an online company with clients and employees around the world so obviously I'm an exception. Thank god I have a family to keep me from totally fusing with my computer screen.

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MY PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT

Be aware

give all my calm, centered attention

help people feel good about themselves

let happiness exist unconnected to circumstance

The FOCO

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