What we want and how we go about getting it

Does an alcoholic wake up in the morning and say, “I want to waste the day away, spend all my money and end the day passed out with puke all over me.”
No.
They wake up saying, I want to be happy, or I want to make this pain go away.
So why do they do exactly the oposite?
Because they are all mixed up. There is something inside them, be it chemical or psychological, that is not working correctly.

Most people are not dysfunctional alcoholics, but MOST people ARE all mixed up. Myself included.

I may wake up saying, “I have a lot of things I want to get out of the way today.”
And then I feel overwhelmed and go back to sleep….

Or how about this:
I want my girlfriend to stop acting a certain way.
So I say and do things so she does it EVEN MORE….

What we want and how we do things are often completely at odds with each other. If you step back it is clear there is stuff inside us that completely clouds our reason. If I was being reasonable I would not go back to sleep on a day where there was a lot to do.

So what is it that makes us do this?

I think it is a lack of inner clarity. It is like we have all this murky garbage floating around inside us that clogs up our ability to see what is good for us.

If I was clear, when my girlfriend annoys me I would act in ways that made her stop doing whatever was annoying me. It is such simple logic.

So the goal is to become clear, to clean out all that garbage. Doing that is not easy but it is possible. I think it is done by being our own baby sitters.

The largest difference between children and adults is that adults should no longer need outside structure. By the time you are an adult you should have formed enough inside structure to keep it together both on the outside and inside.

A lot of adults still have work to do in that area. Myself included.

So you start now. Next time you want to be a baby, be your own baby sitter. A grown up does not get drunk when what what they really want is happiness (hopefully a baby doesn’t either, but you get the point). They suck it up and deal with the issue because they know that is the path to happiness.

When I have a shit load of stuff to do I don’t go back to bed. I suck it up and deal with it like an adult. Sure it is hard but going back to sleep isn’t the solution.

Now we can’t be super heroes right away or forever. This is a process. We all start at our own level and we do what we can. It is a life long process and not something that lasts a week until you burn out. Pacing is the key. It takes about 30 years to become an adult if all goes well. But shit happens.

Starting now is crucial. Gotta go, my babysitter is calling.

Tags: human behavior, logic, structure

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